Here’s my biggest problem with writing. I don’t know what to write. It’s like I think, hey, maybe I should write about this, this, this, this and that and then I sit down, pull up a chair, start typing, and bam! Wall. This is basically me, every single time:
Now, I don’t necessarily consider myself particularly A.D.D., but my brain does have a tendency to go all over the place. I can never just focus on one thing or another for too long. Even having a conversation with anyone can turn into a saga if I have enough time. Those who talk to me for more than a minute or two will tell you that I can cover at least 6 different topics in the span of time that most people finish one fully complete story.
My best friends are pretty similar in this way and if we were still living in a world where I had to watch my cellphone minutes, I’d need a full-time job just to pay the bill. I don’t even really like to talk on the phone usually but when it happens, my conversations last for hours. My husband has just learned to cope at this point. I’m pretty sure he’s like the dad from Inside Out and has a completely different scenario and scene playing out in his head at all times.
Now, this is just who I am. I’ve come to terms with this and those closest to me, usually, just let me ramble and know that there’s method to my madness. Despite having an over active imagination and gift of gab, I struggle to organize my thoughts. This is where the evil green monster comes in, and I’m not talking about this guy:
I’m talking about jealousy… Yeah! I said it… Now, I’m not an overly jealous person. Unless it comes to my husband… then, well, let’s just say….
BUT, otherwise, I’m just really chill and laid-back. And this jealousy is towards really awesome, established bloggers and writers. Now, I am amazed at what they do and seriously wish them the best; however, I so wish I could be that way. I’m sure it’s not as flawlessly easy as I see it and it probably doesn’t come as easy as my delusional mind builds it out to be; but, in the crazy world that is my brain, I just assume they sit down and BOOM! Words, letters, and dare I say, proper grammar and punctuation just pop up on the page?
So, what I’ve needed to learn is that I can’t overthink it. I just need to get the words out of my head and the rest will come. My goal is to just write. I don’t know what kind of writer I am. I don’t know what kind of blogger I am. I don’t even know if I’m either one of those things. But here I am, half past midnight, needing sleep, and typing words into a document. That’s step one.
::Insert inspirational quote here::